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My lust for Raven spirals out of control.

It was dropped and the subject changed. She didn't seize the opportunity to have some well-deserved extramarital sex like I had hoped, but she didn't freak-out either. In the back of my mind I felt that she was a little disgusted or at least turned off, but being the good wife she is, she hid it well.

Over the next few months I would casually mention some of my hotter dreams to her and she seemed to become more accepting that this was a "new" little kink of mine that was harmless as long as she didn't plan to take me up on the offer. She would sometimes (rarely) tease me by asking me if her boyfriend had stretched her pussy enough for me because she knew that I liked the feel of "sloppy seconds". This would always get me going and have me ejaculating in seconds flat.

One evening after a few drinks I playfully started to joke with her about fucking another guy. We went back and forth for a few minutes before I admitted to her that it was more than a fantasy for me. "As a matter of fact I would give my left nut to watch you fuck another man." I confessed. I also admitted that I would masturbate at home while she went out with her friends and came home late, thinking about her meeting some guy and getting laid. A couple of times I even went as far as to place some condoms in a pocket of her purse "just in case" she would unexpectedly meet a new fuck buddy.

"So basically, you've been jacking yourself silly whenever I've gone out with my friends, thinking about my potential infidelity. But Paul, how much have you thought about it actually happening? How would you feel about me coming home with torn panties after some guy has had his way with me? Have you thought about the fact that I might let him do things to me that you haven't done? I might let him fuck me in the ass, or I may decide to let him fuck me without a condom? Have you thought about how you would feel if I enjoy the pleasure that he gives me more than the pleasure I get from you? What if I want to keep fucking him after your little fantasies fade? What if I get used to his big cock, the way it fills me completely? Have you thought about the reality of any of these things?"

I told her that I had given it a lot of thought. I knew that she loved me and wouldn't leave; we were partners and soul mates. I told her that as long as we kept what we were doing from the kids, there would be no other "rules" for her to follow. It would start and stop at her pleasure and what she did or didn't do with him or what she told or didn't tell me was up to her. She smiled sadly at me and said "I love you honey, but this just isn't going to happen. I'm sorry, I don't want to disappoint you but you have to understand that this doesn't turn me on and its never going to happen." I had a lump in my throat and felt somewhat foolish for sounding so pathetic. To save further embarrassment I joked that never is a long time. "If you ever change your mind just let me know". We never mentioned it again and I vowed to stop telling her my dreams and fantasies on the subject.

Memorial Day was a pleasant relief from the long New England winter. We were invited to a friend's annual Memorial Day get-together. I usually elect to stay home and watch the kids so Donna can get a break and kick it up with her all of her old pals. Since I've never really clicked with her friends, missing this party is a no brainier. However this year Donna's mother unexpectedly offered to sit the kids, so I decided to suck it up and accompany her to the annual event. We arrived at the party around dusk when things were starting to get in gear. The people who brought their (uninvited) children were soon departing or long gone and everyone seemed to have a pleasant buzz from the company and booze.

Donna was busy with all the hugs and kisses associated with greeting friends that haven't been seen for a year.

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